


i've got to find my soul all before i sleep

by trolljim (starconsequence)



Category: Tales of Arcadia (Cartoons), Trollhunters - Daniel Kraus & Guillermo del Toro
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Gen, Krel is mentioned, M/M, Mentions of Violence, Multi, Other, Polyamory, Post-Canon, Slice of Life, Trans Jim Lake Jr. (Tales of Arcadia), Trans Male Character, Transformation, Troll Jim Lake Jr., Wizards Spoilers (Tales of Arcadia), finding a part of yourself you thought you lost, i guess that tag goes here lmao, jlaire in the second part, relationships are not the focus of the first part, this will probably all be obsolete with canon when the movie comes out
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-25
Updated: 2020-10-03
Packaged: 2021-03-06 14:15:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 16,796
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26110243
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starconsequence/pseuds/trolljim
Summary: The dust settles upon a torn world, and Jim tries to pick up the pieces of himself, figuring out what exactly ate at him.Jim's jellied limbs struggled – too human and too weak to even properly try to withdraw the blade into his arms and he stepped away, pouting slightly in disappointment. It wasn't in the fact the sword refused to be drawn; but because he was weak, because there wasn't his sun-scorched skin.Because Jim Lake Jr. was human again.
Relationships: Barbara Lake & Jim Lake Jr., Barbara Lake/Walter Strickler | Stricklander, Jim Lake Jr./Claire Nuñez, Toby Domzalski/Darci Scott, Toby Domzalski/Jim Lake Jr., Toby Domzalski/Jim Lake Jr./Claire Nuñez
Comments: 22
Kudos: 88





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> can you tell that i've been working my butt off after wizards released, and i had some Things to say about human again jim?
> 
> // title is from cosmo sheldrake's rich

“Where's Jim?” Douxie called out, lead on by Claire and Steve, his weight heavy on their supports.

Jim watched with a crooked, but relieved smile. Fingers clenched around a small fragment of what he had been ( stone, debris he later tucked into the pocket of his hoodie to keep safe ) as their group parted to reveal him to the Master Wizard who had fought so hard for them, and gave his life in self-sacrifice.

“Mordrax's miracles. Seems like I've missed a lot.” Douxie mused, eyes wide in disbelief that Jim stood once again on two human feet. Jim could feel that – his memories of the brief time spent in the Arcane Order's _command_ were hazy at best, a pixie's dream he couldn't wake from.

Claire left Hisirdoux's side to hold Jim's ( _human!!_ ) hands, her metal-clad fingers cold in his and bringing up a longing within him to take host in the hollow of his heart left behind by the cursed shard and the lack of precious sun cast silver.

“Same, but glad to be back.” He spoke, a rehearsed smile on his face to pause the onslaught of thoughts as pain prickled back along fine hairs on his arms.

“What about Arthur?” Douxie inquired, leaning against Steve and staring down the trolls in their presence.   
“Squished.” AAARRRGGHH!! helpfully added, an easy smile on his toothy mouth.

“Indeed.” Blinky in all his banged-up glory interjected, looking onto his adoptive son – fully human again. “And I'm afraid with their demise, Excalibur...” He gestured with one of his good arms to something behind the group.

“Is right over there!” Toby finished Blinkous's sentence for him, crying out in awe, running over as fast as his short legs could carry him.

Toby tried to pull Excalibur from the stone it bit into. The blade, however, refused to budge. Tobes stumbled back, defeated and somewhat out of breath at the effort. “Okay, I had to try.” He admitted, shrugging the worry off.

Jim couldn't help but smile – it was the first thing he really saw of Toby in the last year, the self-appointed duke's charm bringing an honest upturn to his best friend's lips.

Blinky's hand settled on his back. “What of you, Master Jim?” His baritone inquiry sparked several scattered cautions in his brain.   
“What?” Jim defensively spluttered.

Douxie followed Blinky up without hesitation. “Jim, Blinky's right.” Now it just felt like they were ganging up on him. Jim glanced over to where Steve lead the Master Wizard over to them, raven and indigo hair ruffled with the fall and impact, twigs tangled into his hair. “With Arthur gone, someone needs to wield Excalibur.”

Claire wandered over to stand beside the golden sword as she spoke. “Who better than the Trollhunter?” He knew they were trying – making attempts to glaze over the shattered fragments of his identity that Jim did not quite yet know to what extent they were broken. Toby's hopeful smile rested upon the sunlit hilt.

A small shred of courage bloomed in his chest, gathering up the splinters of himself to _try_ as he squinted, readying himself for a burn. Waiting for Claire or Toby to provide shelter for him from the petrifying sun. Jim flinched as hands flexed into the sunlight to wrap around Excalibur's hilt. Teeth grit, steeling himself and letting out a hiss in preparation...

For pain that never came, for the sun has no true hatred for human skin.

Jim's jellied limbs struggled – too human and too weak to even properly try to withdraw the blade into his arms and he stepped away, pouting slightly in disappointment. It wasn't in the fact the sword refused to be drawn; but because he was weak, because there wasn't his sun-scorched skin.

Because Jim Lake Jr. was _human_ again.

As their hard-won friends departed them on what was left of Camelot's existence, Jim stood for the first time in centuries in a form not clung to by stone and metal, but cloth and flesh and _squishy._ Alone with his thoughts in the thundering silence of his mind.

His brain felt scraped and shaken up, like it had been thrown into the Food Magic to be poured out back into his skull – which felt too light, and he self-consciously ran his tongue over flat _human_ teeth. Numb to the truth he stood in, the world at arm's length, dense fog clouding any spare thought.

Jim had been prepared to give up his humanity forever to keep his friends and family safe.

And now, he was back to normal – an old normal, and the sudden shift in height, in _mass_ , was disorienting.

With Callista – _Deya_ 's unintended help, Jim had begun to come to terms with being a troll, embracing his new body.

Now, it seemed what had been sewn into stone had somehow changed – as if going fully troll had in a way been the thing that was what restored him to fully human, no longer a foot in each world.

Yet, it was strange, at the time, it had been Merlin's unwanted gift. But it had been something still in the world of the wizard, and now it too was gone – the only thing left being the guidance and paths he had paved for Douxie and their generation of... protectors? Maybe that would be the right word, but Jim already had so many things to tinker with in this new, but familiar world.

If Jim were to be fully honest about everything – it was a sensory overload. The scratch of what used to be soft fabric now too coarse against skin that could sense, could _give_ to touch and even the grip of compression at his chest before wasn't enough to make him want to leave his body – his flesh-bag.

He had been resurrected.

Something about _that_ made alarms set off in his mind, itch away at his skin. There'd been too much resurrection in the last days – Morgana twice then; King Arthur; and himself. Back from the dangerous precipice of the onyx shard buried over his heart, denting the amulet's place in the Eclipse armour.

Eclipse - the glowing red over inky metal he had grown to find comfort in imprisonments in - the dwellings of stone that he dwelt in, body and temporary homes. He already missed it, missed the armour, but it was like when he missed being _the_ Trollhunter in Unkar's vision before his trial lifetimes ago. Even the destruction of the amulet to get them _into_ Merlin's tomb was only temporary, made right by Merlin's tinkering and Claire's hair clip.

All a hollow ringing in his chest, clinging to his doubts.

Now that too was gone; obliterated by Morgana's pitiful, unwanted return to flesh. The hours spent trapped in the hulking form that had been buried within him all that time, a trollish perversion of his soul now that he thought about it: the way primordial growls grit his teeth and flared his chest as a troll; and in the Deep, when he squared off against a shadow self during his sentence, one that was troll in human form.

The events made a lot of sense, but even that he _missed,_ and now in the quiet of a new dawn, of a new _day_ that he could actually breathe in, walk in – his mind was playing the greatest game of catch-up.

“Jim?” Claire's voice cut through the spiral, shaking him out with a gentle touch to his arm – hand on human skin. Sunlit touch burning his wishful prison. “Jim, are you okay?”

“It would be a lie if I said yes.” Jim allowed a shaky laugh to leave, eyebrows pinching just slightly as he set a hand on her side, staring into her big mousy eyes. She had aged in so little a time, refined and cut to be a fine wizard herself in only _days._

He would also be lying if he denied that she and Morgana were similar, now that they'd come to know the actual woman under the gilded arm or and mask.

The Trollhunter still couldn't believe that they were safe – that Claire was safe, and that he was no longer facing a shard in his chest; a bomb paused in its detonation that he set off with seconds left on the clock, and whatever enchantments had kept him in the Arcane Order's dictated commands.

The same enchantments likely still keeping him alive until he was turned to stone from the inside out.

That had been – Terrifying,Horrifying... Neither word could not even come close to how violent the fear had been, being frozen crying out in fear for his girlfriend, her horror on her pretty face the last thing he saw before his vision faded, eyes turned to stone.

“I'd be even more worried if you did say you were fine.” Claire breathed, stroking the bangs back from the side of his face to stare into his eyes, tracing his human features like he was about to solidify again. “Can't believe we might have had to take your statue back to your mom – that would have been beyond awkward to explain. The stone might have been straightforward. The epic hulk moment? Not so much.”

“Claire.” He smiled, but shook his head as he tapped her elbow. She pulled in to hug him again, human bones almost breaking under the strain of her embrace before she released him to the wild of humanity.

“Speaking of my mom...” Jim trailed off, going to pull out his phone before remembering it had run out of power having tried to explain himself to Deya and the other trolls that he had... not always _been_ a troll. A pat of his pockets proved that he didn't even have the device anymore – lost somewhere along the way. “How badly do you think it would scare her if we showed up at her house?”

Her house – Jim hadn't quite realized when it had no longer been _home_ anymore – home had become Blinky, AAARRRGGHH!!! and Claire as they travelled with the mismatched band of trolls in their messy search for a new Heartstone.

How wrong had it all gone in hindsight.

Claire laughed, ringing bells to Jim's ears as she leaned in close to him. His nose itched, not picking up what he was used to – and it should be something he welcomed, knew that in _good_ conscious that the duller senses should be something to be proud of. But, as it sunk in: his chest, although lighter, felt so much _heavier._

The burden of the world had been lifted off of Atlas's shoulders, one to be burdened by another, someone wizened by the centuries in ways that Jim couldn't even come close to knowing.

“My parents will probably be happy to see me. ' _Mija,_ it's so good to see you.'” Claire playfully mocked her parents' tone, crossing her arms. “'My, what have you learned? Witchcraft? _Oh no, mija._ '”

Jim shook his head, a small smile on his lips as he listened to her.

“You do make a good point, Jim.” She changed the subject back to Jim's predicament. “At least there's no longer a wizard for her to threaten.” Her tone darkened, referring to when his mom had been ready to beat Merlin into scraps with a kitchen broom after he'd changed.

Doux was off to some other world on Earth, running with Nari from the Order, and thus was safe from potential Barbara Lake brand wrath.

“Come on, let's get some tacos first. I bet you're starving.” Toby spoke up, poking into sight. “I know _I'm_ starving, and I'm always good for tacos.”

 _Human food_. Jim wondered – never having even given that particular cuisine a thought as a troll. His best friend had brought some into Trollmarket ages ago, back when the world seemed so vast, and there had been no issues for the trolls to eat it.

Claire sighed dreamily. “ _Si_ , Toby,” a hand patted her stomach. “I'm so hungry I could eat a few dozen burritos.”

“Oh, wait, the taco guy turned out to be an alien. He's pretty chill – I think he's a Durian? Like that stinky fruit you've tried once, Jimbo.” Toby rambled as he started off, turning to Jim. The Trollhunter avoided his friend's gaze for a moment to give Excalibur one final glance before forcing himself to look away.

“Sure, tacos sound good. Lead the way, Tobes.” Jim gestured with a too-light hand, a smile on his face as he pretended to not be cracking apart inside.

Before anything, Claire opened a portal into Toby's room. The three of them gently placing Excalibur in safe keeping before they made their way to the best taco truck in all of Arcadia.

“Do you think I'm still fit to be _the_ Trollhunter?” His voice cracked in his soft admission as Jim cradled a taco, human limbs so compact as he curled into something akin to a fetal position.

Apprehension kept him staring at the offensive taco as he expected his stomach to slickly flip-flop before deciding to inevitably hand Claire the human food and eat the foil.

“Why? Because there's no amulet?” Toby's gaze flickered from taco to best friend's face – he'd never seen Jim eat as a troll, so it was likely he didn't know why Jim wasn't devouring it.. “Neither of us have amulets, and you still considered us Trollhunters, Jimbo.”

He had to hold back a bitter, spiteful comment – choosing to take a bite instead. It was quickly devoured. Finally tasting human food, the taste was simply long into outer space.

Fitting, for a Durian was running the truck.

“Yeah.” He shrugged it off with his mouth still full of taco, water down a duck's back. Toby couldn't know the heartache the amulet's loss was. He still had _his_ war hammer, still had his armour. Jim didn't even have his Vespa to go back to.

Being the trollhunter was supposed to be a mantle Jim held upon his shoulders until his inevitable death. To outlive it had been something Jim had never considered. Even when Jim had shattered the amulet to find Merlin's tomb, it had still glowed with life.

“I mean, the food's always good. Makes sense that an alien made it.” Jim joked, trying to find some normality deep within him – that he's still a regular seventeen year old kid turning eighteen, and not a seventeen going on seventy old man; that he's not made of blood-steel and stone; that more than just his blood is human.

“Durian. They don't like being called aliens, dude.” Toby quickly corrected and Jim held his tongue between his teeth at that. “But yeah, out of this world.”

Jim's second taco doesn't take as long to get eaten, but Jim savours it longer, lets the spiced meats and piled-on vegetables simmer on his tongue. It's nice to taste proper food, and not just the wrapper, or the various junk that lay around. Socks hadn't been so bad, he'd finally understood what a good argyle tasted like. The sock brewed coffee had been quite delicious, after Blinky had found a roast other than French, a discarded bag with an orange mermaid on it. He had joked that there were probably mermaids out there, only to be slightly nettled as Blinky confirmed his jest.

Claire had simply laughed at his despair at the time.

“So, how was your trip, other than the doom aspect of it?” Toby nervously tried to defuse the tension that had built up around Jim.

“We had been pretty close, before the Arcane Order and Arthur had tracked us down.” Jim scratched his head, finishing up his taco. “Like, really close to finding that Heartstone.”

“Some of them stayed behind to keep looking when we had to come back here for reinforcements.” Claire explained, filling in the gaps of Jim's memory, “Merlin had Jim in that stasis stone pretty quickly after he got that shard in his chest.”

“Ah.” Toby nodded. “Could you return to them?” His voice was a little heavy, as if worried that Jim and Claire would leave again.

“By using them as an emotional anchor? Yeah, I probably could, but I want to have a little bit of downtime and decide if we want to.” Claire chewed on a bite of the burrito, pausing to reach for a chip and some salsa Stewart had gifted them.

('To the saviours of this little town! Saving us from a couple of right apocalypses.' He had announced, dropping a healthy sized bag of chips and a small vat of salsa picante in front of them. Jim didn't want to ask about that. There must have been another world ending event when he was away.)

“Kind of want to just be us for a bit. The world's been really crazy.” She laughed, still wearing the dress that made her look so out of place in the present world. “I've had enough of saving it for a little bit. She's safe, Douxie's with her, and we'll hear from them in hopefully a month or two.” Claire spoke of Nari, not wanting to invoke anything listening to them.

“Yeah, there's been a lot going on.” Toby distantly muttered into his taco. “But nothing that the three of us can't handle, right, Jimbo?”

“You're right, Warhammer.” Jim gave him a sheepish smile. He already missed the armour's safety.

“Hey, I'll walk home with you.” Toby offered, trying to find some way to ease Jim's _corazon muy pesado._

“I'd like that.”

“Well, if you boys don't mind, I'll just go home and see my parents. I'm sure they'll be happy to see me.” Claire smiled, patting Jim's shoulder.

“I should walk you home.” Jim protested.

“And they say chivalry is dead.” Clair smiled, teasing her boyfriend. “Don't worry about it Jim, I can get home as soon as we finish our food. You haven't seen Toby in months. You've never been apart this long.”

Jim sighed, nodding with a smile as he accepted Claire's decision. “Alright, Claire. If you say so.”   
He watched her leave them when she finished, stepping into a portal she artfully opened.   
  


  
Toby kept up with Jim surprisingly well as they walked back to the cul-de-sac they'd grown up in, but Jim couldn't tell if it was Toby getting out to walk more, or if he was still adjusting to his shorter legs. The distance they used to cover all the time seemed so much longer.

“So... Now that Claire's gone, what's it really like being back?” Toby asked him quietly, looking up at him with those big doe eyes of his that Jim loved so dearly.

A breath steeled an unsure fledgling's flight – “I... I'm still processing it. I thought the transition to being a troll was hard. The sun's too bright, it's hot as Gatto's keep, and I know it's not that hot out right now. I keep thinking the sun's going to burn me.” Jim sighed. “I... I miss it.”

“Oh, Jimbo...” Toby paused in his pace, brows up and pinched, sorrow heavy in his tone. “Are you happy?”  
“Claire is.” He shrugged, deflecting the question without thinking. “That's the least I can do.”

“Jim, I asked if you're happy, not Claire.” Toby strode forward. “I love Claire too, but you don't treat yourself the same way, dude. You put yourself last, every time. Be selfish for once.”

Jim had not expected Toby to stop beside him, take a deep breath and then sock him as hard as he could on the arm.

“Toby, what the -” Jim winced as he reeled back, hand going to grab his upper arm to squeeze the injury.

“Be glad it's not the face, Jim.” Toby's expression was flat – serious as he stared up at Jim. “Would you have stayed a troll?”   
“What would you think of me if I did?” Jim started walking again, mentally already running for the hills from the truth.  
“Well, I'd support you, Jimbo. You'd still be my best friend.” Toby started jogging to catch up the short distance. “I meant what I said on the school rooftop. Though, I feel like I didn't really get to know the troll you. Bet he was cool.”

Jim offered him a small smile. “Thanks, Toby.” They turned the last bend towards their street. “And for the record... I kind of do wish...” He trailed off to silence, seeing the familiar houses, a weight crawling back onto his shoulders to dwell. Unlike before, it was quiet – bearable. The dread of seeing his mother, putting her through all of this so very quickly.

He wondered if she'd painted at all since coming into care of so many children.

“Do you want me to come with you to see your mom?” Toby asked him quietly, hand going to hold Jim's, giving it a reassuring squeeze. “And if you need it, there's always room with me and Nana.”

Jim gently squeezed back. “Thank you, Toby, but I think I can do it alone.” Toby didn't make a fuss as Jim kept walking, but didn't let go of his hand. His friend lapsed into silence, something on his mind, but for once Toby just let him stay silent beside him.

Jim eventually let go, standing in front of Toby's house. “Hey, I'm right over here, if you need it.” Toby quietly spoke, eyes fixated on the shadowed porch.

“Thank you.” Jim breathed, taking in a solid breath, soaking in the organic rise and fall of his chest before striding across the road and over to his childhood home, past an almost-always tipped over trash can and to the door.

He shifted on his feet, thoughts far away of a different time – stumbling back home on too-long legs through the door to all but fall into the house as his mother screamed for him before his vision had gone black, body still sifting through the shock of such a drastic transformation.

“Alright, Jim, now or never.” He quietly reassured himself before knocking firmly on the door, breath stopping for a moment as he _listened_.

He could hear his mother shouting something, probably at her troll boyfriend, as she walked towards the door to yank it open.

“Hello, how-” Barbara Lake started, before gawking at her child. “ _Jim!_ ” She gasped, pulling him into her arms. “Welcome home!”

Her mother bear hug crushed him – but he let her hold on for everything she needed. It was a stockpile of every hug she had wanted to give him since he had left on his trip, before the newest end of the world.

“How – how are you human again?” She gasped after a moment – as if the information just sunk in, pulling back to cup his face, feeling the softness of his cheeks and gaze into the unchanged blue of his eyes.

“I don't really know myself.” Jim found himself laughing as his mother pulled him back into another hug, shoulders drooping as he felt at home. “It's a long story, you'll want to sit down.”

“Tell me tonight, after dinner, and after the kids are asleep.” She pulled him into the house, closing the door. “Walt! Jim's home!” She turned to call to his changeling teacher.

“Young Atlas?” Strickler turned a corner, still bare chested. He carried a baby in each arm, bouncing them as he walked, wide eyed. “Well, this certainly is a surprise.”

Jim smiled and sighed. “You can say that again.”

“Hey, do you want to cook supper?” Barbara brought up. The prospect perked him up, and he quickly trotted off to take a look at the fridge and freezer to plan food, shoving his thoughts to the Deep of his mind, burying the trollish thoughts and habits to some fragmented identity of his to simply be Jim, human son of Barbara.

“Do you miss it?” Barbara asked Jim over dinner that night, elaborate dishes of Jim's human favourites – ones he ate like a starving man. He missed _food_. The last thing he had any recollection of eating was the basket Claire had brought pies in with them on a date before the battle of Killahead.

That and the tacos, but they never lasted long in his stomach.

_There was a prayer in the back of his mind of hoping he had not bitten into human flesh as Arthur's controlled monster, but his hollowed stomach simply reinforced the fact he had not eaten at all._

“Hm?” Jim acknowledged the question around a mouthful of garlic potatoes, eyebrows shooting up as he heard her, knowing what she meant. He glanced at Strickler, picking at a plate of bloody steak and a smaller serving of potatoes and a few other things he insisted he would eat. Yellow cat eyes stared back at him with the signature surly pinch of rocky lips. Food was swallowed before continuing, “No, I don't.”

A lie. He missed being a troll, he liked the height, his long legs and the feeling he couldn't be hurt – a facade of a teenager's hubris, proven when the cursed Excalibur's shard corrupted him - and knowing he was a wall between his loved ones and the threats to their safety. He did miss being a human, he missed cooking, and the potential future he had with Claire and being mortal – but there was a sneaking suspicion that she was ... changed herself, no longer mortal.

He missed that part of him, the pride of being Blinky's beloved son carried amidst all of his responsibilities and burdens – wanting to be more like him. He could see it in Blinky's eyes – a sadness that echoed his own soul at the great loss and change Jim had gone through yet again.

“Alright then.” His mother shrugged it off, like mothers do, and Jim had the feeling a quiet, worried confession would be given to Walter later. She took another bite of her own food before reaching over to spoon soft carrot mash into one of the changeling familiars' mouths. “Eloise, dear, please don't spit that out.” She softly scolded the girl, scraping the orange gunk off her chin and got it back into her rebellious mouth.

“How's life as the parents to a whole bunch of babies?” Jim teased her, diverting attention onto the many kids crowded around the table.

“Well, it helps that the local orphanage could take some of these children, and I made sure they would go to families here, as well as I've searched what I could of the Janus Order's files to match disguised changelings to descendants to place them back with birth families.” Walter spoke, though his gaze settled on a dark haired baby Jim recognized from his trudge through the nursery to find Enrique all those months ago. His own familiar – Waltholomew Stricklander.

Jim didn't say anything but nodded. “Do you have work?” He asked Strickler.

“Aside from the genealogy work for the children? I _was_ offered a position back at the school once classes resumed in the fall, now that the truth of trolls have been revealed. Though that could be _interesting,_ now that the school has been damaged. I'd imagine you had a hand in that, Young Atlas.” A brow quirked upwards, accompanied by a toothy teasing smirk. Jim sheepishly fiddled with his fork, stabbing into his own steak.

He still expected the fork to smell the best, expected his teeth to bite down against the metal to chew, but human teeth were not equipped to do that – expected human food to taste bland and his mother seemed to already forget that awkward first dinner after he'd become a troll. He could sense with what was left of habits that Walter was watching him silently, as if writing a list of what to talk to him about in private.

Pain shot though his bottom lip as he bit into the soft flesh lining the inside of his mouth, and Jim hissed in pain. “Bit my lip.” He groaned, hand going to cup the right side of his face, nursing it for a moment.

“Ouch.” His mom spoke, looking back over her shoulder at her son. A small smile offered a sympathy.

The rest of the meal went along smoothly, and even dessert had been tasty – a joint effort between Walter and Barbara to result in something _actually_ edible that she had worked on. No substituting sugar for salt, or any other disastrous result as Jim remained at the table, watching the handful of babies under their care.

Putting the children down for the night had been difficult, Jim listening to them softly speak to each child by name, tucking them into the room that had once been Jim's bedroom. The love they shared with each other and the children was... nice. Even though he had a grudge against his teacher for falling for his mother.

But, he was there for her, after all the bumps in the road. She had finally moved on from her ex, and found a new love in life. Everything seemed peachy.

Jim just felt out of place, shifting from foot to foot at the door as if he were a voyeur.

Eventually, they had finished. Barbara's bags looked darker-set than usual.

“Do you want something to drink, and then we can catch up properly?” Barbara asked Jim softly amongst the garden of sleeping children.

“I'd like that.” Jim nodded.

Strickler pushed past him first to go downstairs, only saying a quick apology as he swept down to the kitchen. Barbara ushered Jim to follow.

Jim's hands balled on his legs as he sat on the couch, Barbara in her favourite chair. His mother cradled a cup of tea in her hands, letting the brew swirl and dwarf Jim in the anxieties hanging in the air.

“So, are you working right now?” He asked, attempting to break the tension as they waited for Strickler to rejoin them, bringing two more cups of tea for Jim and himself.

Barbara gazed into the dark tea for a moment. “I took some time off from the hospital for a month to work on getting some of the children into other families, and just look after the ones we will most likely just adopt ourselves.” She sheepishly admitted.

Jim smiled. “I see.” He felt hollow, distant. She was moving on, and he ached – for something else. He ached for the home of stone that was his own body. He ached for movement – for the lead of change.

“So... What happened after you left for New Jersey?” Barbara asked.

Jim started to recount their travels.

“Mom, the next part – you're not going to like it.” He stopped himself before he got to where they had started running into the Arcane Order, and the Green Knight – before he had been cursed.

“No more secrets, we promised. No matter how much you think I'll hate it, I can handle it. I'm an ER doctor, remember?” Barbara smiled reassuringly. Strickler stayed silent near them, eyes fixated on the now-again human.

“Alright – then. So, we were pretty close to finding the new Heartstone – the Troll life force, we can kind of ... sense it, when we're close to it. The world's burden gets easier the closer you get, and it's basically like... Slipping into a warm bath? Coming home? I don't know – it's not a feeling I can put a human term on.” he glanced at Strickler for backup.

“A Heartstone is something more essential. It ties trolls to existence. It's like anti-depressants for humans. TV static is a close second to how it feels, but TV static is more like a highly addictive drug. But Heartstone? There is no greater honour than to live near it. It's like taking a vacation on a beach, lying in the hot sun.” He spoke reverently about it. “My greatest regret is being unable to feel the Heartstone in Trollmarket in this form. Young Toby tells me it is currently full of 'troll zombies'.”

Jim snorted at that, but he couldn't imagine what lurked in the dark there – he knew Tobes had asked about something Kanjigar knew about, but even Blinky didn't know, and he had been one of Kanjigar's closest allies.

“Anyway, we were close to the Heartstone when we started getting chased by this group of eldritch beings, because – you know – we just can't stay out of a fight with them.” Jim joked, a tired tone creeping into his voice at that, slumping back against the couch's back as he took a sip of tea. “We were tailed by what we knew as the Green Knight. We fought. I got badly hurt.”

His mom followed his hand as he placed it over his heart, bracing an invisible wound that ached as he spoke. He hadn't looked – there was probably a scar, and a cruel one at that.

“A shard of the Knight's sword was lodged in my chest, right over my heart and piercing the amulet. I'm still surprised my armour had survived.”

“Where is the amulet now?” Strickler asked, regret pinching his face as Jim flinched.

“Destroyed – I'll get to it.”

“Of course, all in due time then, Young Atlas.”

Jim nodded, taking a pause to breathe and take a sip of his tea. “So Merlin placed me in this sort of gemstone that kept me in stasis to transport while we got backup. The next thing I saw after waking up from the crystal was this time in the past, knights surrounding us.” He nervously laughed, running his finger along the mug's smooth exterior. “Man, that was wild, I mean – I go from fighting the Green Knight and seeing.... Seeing Claire's face in terror, to waking up to more terror.”

“So, we had ended up in the old days of Camelot, where trolls were widely known of, but if they were within King Arthur's borders, they were hunted and killed. I was actually saved by Gunmar and Bular in the past, because I was a troll to them, one of their kind – even if it was someone yet to be won over to their side.”

He shrugged, taking another sip of tea. “I met AAARRRGGHH!! and Blinky, and I saw Draal.” His shoulders slumped. “I didn't realize what could of happened, and I wished Draal had been here to see me.”

“Jim...” His mom spoke softly, leaning forward as a small handful of precious diamonds tumbled from his cheeks. “I'm sure he'd be so proud of you. My memory of him is still the foggiest, other than ... Vandel?” She glanced at Walter.

“Vendel.” He softly corrected with a small smile, laying his hand on her arm.

“Vendel.” Barbara repeated, pushing her glasses back on her face before turning back to Jim. “But I know that Draal would be so proud of you.”

Jim sniffed, nodding as he reached for a tissue from the table, wiping his cheeks and blowing his nose. “Thanks, Mom. Means a lot.” He smiled wistfully before sighing and continued to recount the tale. “But yeah, so, Arthur's sister Morgana...”

Jim slept on the couch that night after he'd finished recapping everything, old blankets pulled out from storage and pillows that still smelt just the slightest like _him_ as he buried his face into the fluffy pile.

Or should have slept – if his body could allow it, too used to a nocturnal schedule.

Everything was too quiet – too used to the noises of everyone else around him. There was a clock ticking away somewhere in the house, but his brain wouldn't shut off – no matter how much he begged it.

This was all a strange dream – he'd wake up in Camelot or in New Jersey as a troll, roused by his turn to watch. A dream haunted by his fears and more like a nightmare.

But reality was different, shifting proved to be strange – no horns getting in the way of specific ways of getting comfortable, and it was too easy to fit onto the couch. The differences between recent experiences and the lives of his mother and her boyfriend were just too wide to start bridging in any efficient way.

He'd see if Toby was open to a new roommate in the morning.

Jim's eyes remained open through the night, only drawing heavy as the room lightened with the dawn. Life was just... They were safe, but he mentally was so at odds. The biggest gift the change into Trolldom had been the fact he was _flat_ , tall, reading as clearly a man, with _facial hair_ that wasn't patchy.

He looked _good_ , once he got used to the stone and the horns and the big ol' teeth.

 _Now I'm just back to a work in progress_. He dryly thought, running a hand over his chest after he'd pried the horrid chest binder off. Which thoughts he wasn't sure he hated the drumbeat more of: the head-fuzzying of his self-loathing or the pleas to return to his body of stone.

Frustration flickered through exhausted limbs as he sat up, flipping the pillow before beating it with an open palm to fluff it up. How could Strickler sleep? But, he used to be a stalkling before becoming a changeling. The years of following human sleep schedules as a troll who didn't have to fear the sun might have helped too. Realization etched into his tired face – Jim was _extremely_ jealous of Stricklander.

Jim groaned, rubbing the fleshy parts of his palms into his eyes. “Shut up.” He muttered to himself before forcing his eyes closed into shaky sleep.

In the morning, Jim made breakfast for the three who weren't babies in the household. Setting it aside on warm before getting to work helping out with the kids so everyone could get food into them quickly, still half asleep and only half rested.

“I think I'm going to see if Toby and Nana would like a roommate.” Jim broke the tired silence they'd fallen into, all of them still sort of waking up from a long night and a short sleep.

“Makes sense, it's a little hard for us to have a room for you right now, and I doubt you'd want to keep sleeping on the couch.” Barbara smiled, cutting into the omelette.

He stiffened slightly. “Sorry – well, I mean, I can sleep anywhere at this point.” He hesitated.

“No, it's alright, Jim. We have a bunch of babies around here, and it's not like I wouldn't appreciate another set of hands around here, but I get if you want your own space.” His mom smiled warmly, and the nervous ball in his chest dropped against his stomach before falling silent again.

“Thanks, Mom.” Jim smiled, earnestly and wide. It was an honest, not-fake smile; an anxiety eased. This house no longer felt right – it was a part of his story, but like the human hands that made their breakfast, it was not his own anymore.

After breakfast, Barbara helped clean up, talking to Jim softly about what happened since he'd been gone, how the romance had blossomed between the two of them after they'd cohabited to care for the children, a hard-won forgiveness for Strickler's case. It wasn't all sunshine and rainbows – there had been a lot of stress in the past few months.

Jim helped out with the dishes as she talked, drying up and putting them away. It was nice to take time and do them by hand, having the excuse to do so. Strickler sat on the couch, keeping a careful watch on the childrens' enrichment time, some of the older kids starting to crawl.

“Our biggest problem was making sure this place was baby-proofed.” She smiled. “I feel bad for how many of these kids don't have a family to go back to – but we're their family now, or they will be finding their family soon.”

“There were so many kids in the nursery.” Jim murmured. “They all had their birth year on the information with their name, but Merlin didn't take that into account. He didn't know.” Jim shrugged as he put the stack of plates away.

“The Cradlestone had done a great job of safely bringing the familiars though.” Strickler added. “It kept them in stasis for long enough for us to get a few dozen cribs.”

Jim nodded, finishing up drying and tucking everything away, he roamed around the house, taking in the changes as he looked for a bag. A duffle bag was stashed in the back of a closet, and Jim found his belongings near where his blankets had been, grabbing clean clothes and some other things to set aside.

“I'm going over to see Toby, I'll be back shortly.” Jim called as he left the bag by the door – just in case Nana and Toby didn't have room for another body.

“Take care, Jim.” Strickler called, and Jim smiled before closing the door behind him.

The morning was warm, soft in so many ways. The sun's light couldn't hurt him, but he still winced upon leaving the shade of the porch. Jim supposed, as he crossed the road, that he would still flinch upon reaching into the natural light for some time to come.

He strode up to the door and knocked.

“Coming!” He heard Nana's voice cheer before the door opened up. “Oh! Hello Jim, Toby-Pie hardly told me you were home. Come in, come in, I've got cookies.” She smiled, gesturing him into her house.

The smell of cat hit his nose, though it was a smell he associated with a second home, and he quickly followed her in. There were new pictures on the mantle, the most noteworthy were two bright blue figures – Krel and Aja. He smiled, crossing over to look at the photos.

There was another framed photo of Nana and another hulking figure that looked like he was an Akaridian as well.

“Oh, that's Varvaatos.” Nana spoke, coming up beside him to take the frame in her worn hands. “He and I shared something special this summer, and I plan on moving to his home planet once Toby goes off to college.” She ran a finger over his pictured face lovingly. “He's the guardian of the royal family there, and I'm sure you've met Krel at this point. His sister is queen there.”

“Yeah, I met Krel and Aja. Still can't believe that they're ali – Akaridians.” Jim blinked, but it made sense with how easily the two had come up with a method to capture electricity. He still thought of their human disguises when he heard their names – even if Krel had been in his true form when he'd been with them at the finale of the latest mess.

Nana Domzalski set the frame back onto the mantle, turning to face Jim. “So, why are you here, Jim?”  
“Do you know how my mom has a bunch of kids now?” Jim sheepishly started.   
“Yes, I've gone over to help a few nights in the start. Other than the chess club, I don't have many things occupying my time.” She moved to sit on the couch, patting the cushion beside her. “I get it, everyone has secrets they like to keep to themselves, but I think Arcadia is doing quite well.”

She paused, and Jim could feel the oncoming story – the ever-present elder's ramble about their past, and with time, Jim had come to appreciate the tales.

“When I was a little girl, there were always _things_ , monsters that crept on in the night. I was out late one night, before the wars – when the worst we had to worry about was food, and getting to the next day, the fae were out in droves. We were sent out with twists of rowan wood, and pieces of old bread in our pockets to keep us safe.” She mused. “My first husband was Polish, but I'm Irish, as a little backstory.”

Jim nodded – she jumped from ambling topic to topic, but he found it interesting, listening to her, and what was probably at least a little true, what with his experiences with how pixies were the little daubs of light that haunted the rooms, what was left of fae folk. As he glanced around, he could see a few little small protections – how had he never noticed the horseshoe nailed above the back door before?

“But before the Great War, life was peaceful for myself – my parents had moved to America to escape unrest in Ireland, and they wanted the best for their kids. That said, they still made sure we were protected from the fae if we stayed out past dusk.” She took a cookie and broke off a piece before putting it in her mouth to sort of dissolve.  
“'Now that I think of it, now that I know that trolls are not just the stories parents told their children – I'm not too surprised by everything I've heard in the last year.” Nancy mused and turned to Jim. “So, aside from my little piece, why are you here?”

“Can I move in? At least for a little while?” Jim questioned, fidgeting with his fingers in his lap. “There's not a lot of room with my mom.”   
“Of course! You and Toby have been friends for so long, you're practically a second grandson to me, Jim.” She placed her hand on his shoulder, squeezing reassuringly. “Whatever you need, our house is your house.”

Jim smiled. “I'll be right back with my bag, then.”

Nancy nodded. “I'll make the guest room presentable for you.” She let go of his shoulder and stood up, making her way to the extra room on the first floor.

Jim watched her go, before sighing in relief and went to retrieve his bag.

The bed creaked under him every time he moved, or one of the cats moved. The hairballs left and joined him when they wished, and it seemed like they multiplied every time he came over, with an ever growing list of puns on detective show characters, or other shows that Nana binged.

Dictatious came over in the evening after the sun set, coming to join her in a few episodes, and Jim could hear them speculating late into the night, talking over the show as it proceeded of who they thought did it.

Nana had invested in some channels with audio description, since both of them had pretty bad vision, but Dictatious was more than legally blind by human definitions. He could see blurs and bright colours, but the mid tones and pastels tended to blend together for him.

Jim sighed, petting the cat that had joined him for the time being, staring up at the fish scale ceiling as he begged his mind to shut off for the second night in a row.

His limbs ached to be up, on guard for threats, or at least on a harder surface. The mattress supporting him was definitely soft, a plush cloud that was likely a treat for most guests to sleep on, but not for Jim.

The cat meowed, stretching out to bury its nose into his side, legs tucked between the fluffy body and his. Jim smiled, scratching behind a black ear.

He hated how nights seemed to be sleepless for him now.

“So, Jim.” Toby asked, half paying attention to the game on the screen. With AAARRRGGHH!! being out of the room, Toby could actually play something different for once, opting for a single player title that Jim couldn't remember the name of – but it had something to do with a hero saving a world from a dark evil, and Jim had too much of that in the real world to bother with a fantasy escape like that.

“Yes, Tobes?” He glanced up from the book in his lap. Toby continued to click away at his game as he responded.

“How did your mom take the move?”

“I mean, we talked about it the morning I moved in, like – before.”   
“Mmn.” He acknowledged before he swore, a game over flashing on the tv screen as he pushed himself back up into a sitting position from where he'd been lying on the floor. “I mean, it's good that Doctor Lake didn't go all crazy town banana pants on you. I know those kids have been a handful – babysitting for them's _rough_. Not-Enrique was a handful, but now we don't have to worry about them going troll on us.”

“You're rambling, Tobes.” Jim pointed out.

“Sorry, Jimbo.” Toby rubbed at the back of his neck before getting to his feet. He wandered over to sit by his best friend's side, placing a hand on Jim's arm. The Trollhunter bookmarked his place, though he wasn't fully paying attention to the words – mind miles away after all, lost in the remembrance of being _himself_.

“I worried about you. A _lot_ about you – at first it was okay, you were off to save the world again with Claire, and you had each other.” He started rambling, fingers drumming on Jim's warm skin as he spoke. “First the Eternal Night, and fighting Morgana and you almost died as a troll, and then you went away and almost died again as a troll, while _I_ almost died helping fight off an alien-made apocalypse, and then now this, and you're human again and... _Jim_...” One of his hands found its way to Jim's side, clenching onto his t-shirt as his knuckled turned white.

“We missed you too, Toby.” Jim smiled, leaning in to press a kiss to his cheek. “Though, next time, you can come with us. I feel a little safer knowing that Douxie has left a bunch of hedge witches here to look after the town, and Krel and Steve are here.”

Toby perked up at that. “Really?”

“Yeah, Tobes, really.”

“Thank you.” The relief poured off of Toby. Jim smiled, reaching out to cup his best friend's cheek. “Come on, change games, we'll play something together.”

Toby nodded, leaving Jim's side to go tinker with his games, picking something both of them enjoyed.

“Hey, do you know if I could change back?” Jim asked over the phone to Douxie, alone in Toby's room, cross legged on the mattress. An eye fixed on the TV set, ready to leap and turn it on to start a level of Go Go Sushi if needed. “Like... To a troll.”

“Hm, I don't... Really know. I'm sure Merlin had some crazy spell concocted.” Douxie's accented voice cut through phone static. Jim sighed.

“Yeah, he had us collect a whole bunch of different ingredients, and I'm pretty sure I could get most of them again – femur of a changeling, lightning in a bottle, though the Antramonstrum shell could be an issue.” Jim scratched his chin, eyes drifting off to the side as he recalled what they had to get.

Douxie hesitated.“If you can get a full list to me, I can see if there could be any possible substitutes that would be more readily available. I hate to ask why you know where to find changeling bones, but I have a feeling it has something to do with the Order.” Douxie hesitated. “I know Antramonstrum shell can be replaced by certain strains of enchanted citrine.”

“But... It's doable, right?” Jim asked softly.

“I'm sure we could find something, Jim. Maybe Nari will be able to do something, or maybe it'll be an option that means you'll be in more pain for the transformation.” There was a pause before he continued speaking. “I have the feeling that if it is something she can help with, you don't care what price you'll pay.”

“No. I... I miss it. The sun's nice but I feel... Weak.”

“Did you tell this to anyone else?”

“... Just Toby. Claire seems to be happier with me as a human.”

“But _you_ aren't.”

“No.” Jim's voice tripped, breaking on the small admission.

“It'll have to be something she'll need to get used to. I suggest before we actually go through with it, you talk to her about how you feel.”

“Yeah. Yeah, you've got a point.”

“Get me the list, and Nari and I will see if there's any substitutes we can make, and work our way back to Arcadia.”

“Thank you, Douxie. I'll text you the list and I guess I'll talk to you later.”

“Take care, Jim.” He could hear the small smile in his voice.

Jim paused after he hung up, looking down at how he twiddled one of his own dirty socks in hand, like one would play with a snack. He had to be honest, he looked forward to the day they tasted fantastic to him again. His shoulders felt like a weight had been torn from them, like a problem was finally being solved.

He tossed the sock into the nearby clothes hamper before scrolling through his phone to find the haphazard text Toby's number at the time had messaged him – transcribing Merlin's list.

It was a few days later that Jim got a response from their friends who-knows-where, but likely Douxie had used some kind of magic to help boost the phone signal.

_so, most of the ingredients are mostly accounted for, and the worst off is the antramonstrum shell, but [lily emoji] seems to know where to get that citrine, and she says that everything should be fine._

_we'll be there to keep an eye on you, jim._

_there's a couple things we'll pick up on the way there, like that stink cave extract._

Jim smiled at his phone, texting a quick replay before tucking it back in his pocket as he stared back up at Toby and AAARRRGGHH!!, both huddled over a good game of Go Go Sushi, listening to them shout to each other over the game. It was nice to be home, for certain.

“I got a response.” He simply spoke to Toby, who smacked the start button and paused the game to look back at Jim.

“Woah, dude, that's great! Have you talked to Claire yet about this?” Toby's brows pinched in well-meaning concern.

“Uh, no.” Jim scratched his cheek. Toby huffed, crossing his arms.

“Dude, you gotta tell our girlfriend.”

“Fine,” Jim resigned.  
“What going on?” AAARRRGGHH!! inquired, large eyes fixing on Jim.   
“I'll tell you later, AAARRRGGHH!!, I promise.” Jim smiled. “I just want to tell Claire first, okay, bud?”  
The gentle giant dipped his head. “Alright, Jim. I trust.”   
AAARRRGGHH!!!'s soft acceptance was not something Jim feared. Claire's reaction was what he was worried the most about. She seemed so fixated on him being human again. His heart buried into his chest, a heavy burden to carry. Jim silently prayed she'd take it well.  
  


  
It had been a few days since Toby had pushed Jim to telling Claire about his plan, and he'd invited her to go out on a not-quite-date into the forest.

“Claire.” Jim sighed, sitting in the shade of old stomping grounds when they'd still been back when the world was quieter, their expanse smaller. When they were naive and new, when Enrique was still in the Darklands and they were still completing the Triumbric Stones. When Strickler and Angor Rot were their biggest concerns.

“Yeah, Jim?” She settled down beside him, running her hand to stroke a loose strand of hair behind her ear.

“So, since we returned and I _returned_... I've been feeling not great.” He started, rambling a little. “Like, you're so strong and beautiful _and_ you get to keep your magic.” His left hand flapped, cupping the air at one point to mimic the spellcasters he'd been around lately.

“I feel out of place in my body, it's just not _me_ any more.” Jim glanced up at her, eyes wide and pleading.

Claire simply stared back with patient brown eyes. “I see.” She nodded, face otherwise blank. His head spun as he couldn't get a read on her emotions, praying with every free thought that wasn't swirling around his head for Claire to accept it. That she wasn't angry with him for being so _selfish_.

“Are you mad?” His voice crackled.

Claire moved, going to cup his jaw with both hands, cradling him like something precious and fragile.

“No, I could never be mad at you, Jim. I wish you told me sooner.” She ran her thumb along his cheek. “I love you, no matter what form you are in.”

“Well, good.” He smiled, shouldering the world's weight again. “Douxie basically confirmed we could recreate Merlin's recipe, with a few tweaks. Nari will be there, I think to help make sure it's flawless. She does have a hand in life, and souls.”

“I know that very well.” Claire simply mused in response.

Jim lapsed into silence as her statement fizzled out into an answer in his mind. She was speaking of when he was under the Order's control, broken soul in tangible form.  
“Thank you, for looking for my soul. I'm sure something got fixed there – even a little.” Jim remembered the foggy recollected dreams and spoke quietly. “I can't remember much, but it's more than what I remember as that beast.”

Claire nodded, staring at Jim as if committing his human face to memory. “Try not to do anything else that's life-endangering. I don't think I have enough in me for another go.”

“I make no promises, Claire.” Jim grinned. “But it's better to be prepared for the coming fight – I know one's coming. After all, Skrael and Bellroc are still after Nari, and I have the feeling the last fight will be taking place in Arcadia.”

“It all comes full circle.” Claire teased, poking his side. “Don't go falling off the bridge, Jim.”

“Bular already completed that knock of ironic comedy.” Jim reminded her.

Her reassurance that nothing would change went highly appreciated by Jim, and they found themselves drifting off into reminiscing about their shared past, laughing away.

After a while, Claire caught her breath, pausing for a moment to glance around. “So, about Excalibur. Do you plan on seeing if you can use it after you're a troll again, or something?”

“Yeah, that's the plan. I don't have the amulet anymore, so Daylight's out of the question, and I'll need some kind of weapon, right? You have your magic, and Toby's got the warhammer.” He looked at his hands, both of them a sort of dominant one. “Swords and me – they go hand in hand. It's weird to _not_ have one.”

“Yeah, you didn't really have any weapon in Camelot. I think the amulet being pierced was messing with summoning it.”

“Couldn't even use the helmet. I'm honestly amazed Deya had a helmet when I needed Gunmar's Eye for one.”

“I mean, she had it in all the murals of her, so it makes sense she would have had one.”

“Well, now that I think of it, I think everyone who's a full troll had a helmet as a Trollhunter.”

“You're just the odd one out. Maybe the Triumbric Stones summoned different things for every Trollhunter, depending on need?”

“Though, it was fantastic to see her become the Trollhunter though.” Jim wistfully smiled, remembering a new but old friend all the same. “I wonder why I never saw her in the Void like the others, or even just heard her voice.”

“Maybe it has something to do with the lack of her remains in the Forge? I mean, Draal had reassembled Kanjigar, and we had Unkar and several others.”

“Just not Deya.” He mused before leaning against Claire. “You and Toby might want to brush up on assembling statues.”

“Jim, if you die, I will kill you.” Claire sharply scolded, before smiling. She shook her head and leaned back against Jim, entwining her fingers with his.

“I'll hold you to it, Claire.”

Douxie called again a few days later, interrupting a normal date Jim was on with his girlfriend, and their other partners – Darci and Toby. It had been nice to put the world on hold and enjoy humanity, while waiting for news from Douxie since the materials they needed to find on their end were more-or-less readily available within the valley of Arcadia.

“Hey, Douxie.” Jim spoke after swiping the accept call button. Ever since he'd talked with Claire, he'd stopped forcing himself to follow the more human habits – lingering more in the shadows of buildings and trees, mostly. Occurrences that quieted the anxieties that stirred within new flesh. Sleep still failed to come to him at a reasonable human time, and Jim had the suspicions that being a troll had permanently affected his sleep habits.

“Hello, Jim. Nari and I managed to find a shell, so we won't need the citrine, surprisingly.” Douxie started. “We've collected a majority of the ingredients we need for the recipe. We just need the bone, and the power.” He kept things vague, in case they were somewhere one could overhear, and it would be best if they could conceal themselves for as long as possible after all.

“Woah! Awesome!” Jim found himself in a grin that split from ear to ear, rocking onto the balls of his feet in anticipation. “I can contact Krel – I'm pretty sure he'll – he'll be able to whip up something quick enough to do so, and have a proper way to conduct electricity!”

“Jim... Jim!” He heard Toby's voice, and he glanced back to see Darci's confusion etched on her features, and his babbling brook of words had caught the attention of passers by. He flushed, biting his lip.

“Oops. Sorry about that, work talk.” He quickly turned to the passersby. “Anyway, how far are you?” He asked.

“At least a day, Jim. We don't have to do it right as we get there, though, we have time.” Douxie reminded him, and he heard Nari's soft voice in the background, speaking in a language he couldn't understand, but the Master Wizard hummed – knowing it. He paused to say a response in the same tongue.

“Alright. Well, we'll see you soon.”

“Take care, Jim.” Douxie hung up, three beeps sounding over the line as it disconnected. Jim pocketed his phone and smiled.

“So, the plan's a-go, officially.” He grinned.

Darci leaned in. “Dude, you gotta fill me in, I'm lost.” She tapped a hand on the table, pouting.

Toby grinned, digging out his phone to flip through photos – having learned to have a cloud plan after the fifth phone busted. “So, Jim was a troll when the world was ending, Darci.” He started, flipping through to the pictures he had of Jim.

She nodded. “Damn, Jim, you looked like this? _Wicked._ ” Her mouth popped open in an o-shape in awe. Heat rushed to his cheeks at her remark.

“Alright, so somethin' happened, and now he's back to being a human and our friend Douxie --”  
Claire cut in to expand on that. “You remember him right, lead of Ash Dispersal Pattern?”

“ _Oh!_ Him! Yeah, he hit a Gumm-Gumm with his guitar at the Battle of the Bands.” Darci nodded. “Makes sense how he knew them.”

Jim smiled. “He's now a good friend of ours, even though I kinda hated him at first.”

Claire snorted at that. “Oh, man, no jealousy over this situation,” she gestured to the four of them, “but me getting hit on? Unforgivable.” She teased Jim as he rolled his eyes and wished for death.

Darci smirked, grinning at Jim's despair.   
“Come on, Claire!” He sighed, leaning to rest his forehead against her shoulder.

“Nah.” She grinned.

Toby huffed. “Anyway, our friend Douxie is a wizard, and he's helping Jim get back to the body he knows he's right in. We need to go track down a couple of items ourselves.”

The cop's daughter nodded. “Can I come with?” She inquired, with a raised eyebrow punctuation.

Claire and Toby both glanced to Jim for final say if Toby's girlfriend could come with them.

“Yeah, sure.” He smiled. “Why not.”

“Alright, uh. Awkward situation. It's kind of a pain to get to on foot, or bike, and we need to go grab well... a bone from a dead changeling. Kinda coincidental that Gunmar had killed off a large population of changelings.” Jim sat down on a bench as they walked away from the cafe, thinking about the next move. “I mean, we could go see if Krel would be up to helping us out again now.”

Toby sat beside him, placing a hand on Jim's thigh. “You have a license, but we'll need a car. I guess we could ask my Nana, or we could ask your mom or Strickler for it.”

“I'll ask Strickler about it.” Jim made the decision quickly, knowing he'd rather look to his parents over probably-shouldn't-be-driving Nana Domzalski, pulling his phone out to make the call.

The changeling picked up after two rings. “Yes, Jim?”

“Hey, Strickler. So, I need a huge favour. We need to get to the Janus Order headquarters.”

“And _why_ do you need to?” Suspicion heavy in the question. Jim took a breath, realizing he hadn't talked about becoming a troll again to his mom and her boyfriend.

“Uh... I need a changeling's femur for a spell to turn me... back into a troll.”

There was a pause. “I assume you needed one the first time? Have you told your mother, Jim?”

“No.”

“She's home, if you come here and talk to her about it, I will drive you and your friends there.”

Jim took a steadying breath, glancing at Toby, Darci and Claire. “Alright. We'll be there soon.”

“See you there.” Jim hung up after Strickler's farewell.

“What's the plan?” Claire asked, hands raising to open a portal.

“We go there, I tell my mom I plan on becoming a troll, she cries. Strickler drives us there, and with luck we find the bones of the changeling we took from last time. We find Krel, get him to help us with some Akaridion tech to catch lightning in a bottle again. Douxie comes back, 0and bingo – I'll be a troll again.” Jim shrugged.

“Makes sense.” She sagely nodded. “I would just... shadow portal us to the Order, but I don't exactly have much of an emotional anchor there – not one strong enough to conjure without a staff, anyway.”

“Hence, driving.” Jim pointed out. “Anyway, we should go.” He winced, emotionally preparing to rip the bandaid off.

Claire smiled, going to rub his shoulder for a moment. “Hey, Jim, we've got your back.”

Toby nodded. “What she said, Jimbo.”

Jim took a steadying breath. “Alright.” He got to his feet.

Claire nodded, looking at the other three before focusing, hands coming up as she opened a portal.

Jim stepped through first, and once again the portal had the sensation of being doused with ice water – nerves on fire, brilliantly awake and on guard.

He stared up at his mother's house, three times its normal size, dwarfing him and the mortified knot in his gut.

“You got this, Jim.” Darci smiled as the other three followed him. The Trollhunter nodded, striding up to the house. Strickler pulled it open with excellent timing, as if he had a sense for how long they'd be taking, yellow and red eyes fixated on the teenagers.

“Alright, the four of you. Inside you come.” He pushed the door open and Jim caught the edge, holding it open for his partners to enter. He hadn't exactly told his mom how close he and Toby actually were, debating if he should come clean about his relationship, or leave it for another day, burying it in the chest that with all luck would once again be stone soon.

Walter lead them into the living room to sit them down. Barbara was waiting for them, arms crossed and eyebrow raised as Jim settled in the middle of the couch.

“What did you do now, Jim?” She asked, no-nonsense in her tone.

“It's... More of what I'm going to do.” He hesitated, hands balling on his knees, knuckles white as he struggled to choke up the words, the weight of the world heavy upon Atlean shoulders.

Barbara's sharp inhale did not go amiss as she stared Jim down. “What are you planning?”

“Mom, I'm going to become a troll again.” He admitted, shoulders tensed, ready to run at a moment's notice.

No anger came, only his mother's sympathetic gaze. “Jim, honey...” She got up to cross the room, gently taking one of his hands to run her fingers over the back of his hand, running over healed scars from fights that had been etched into living stone. “I know you weren't feeling the best when you got home, so I thought I'd give you time.” She moved to kneel in front of him.

“I could never be mad at you for you wanting to be who you are, in here.” She gently poked his chest. “You should know that, Jim. I'm your biggest cheerleader.”

Jim's shoulders drooped as he breathed a sigh of relief. His burden had not lessened, but felt lighter, shouldered by others with him.

“Sorry I doubted it.” He murmured, setting his other hand on his mother's head, feeling the soft strands of her ginger hair between his fingers. “Thanks, Mom.”

“Of course, Jim, you'll always be my son.”  
Strickler smiled. “Alright, with that out of the way, I promised Jim and company a ride.”   
Barbara glanced up. “Are you alright, Walt?” She frowned. “Do you need me to drive?”  
“I'm quite capable of still driving a car, Barbara. I am a man of my word.” She got to her feet, patting away any dust from her knees.   
“Alright, Walt.”

“Besides, if they need an adult for any reason, I'm right there.”   
She sighed and nodded, taking her glasses off to pinch the bridge of her nose. Walter pecked her lips with a quick kiss. “Hold down the fort while I'm gone, Barbara.” He gently teased. A smile was returned with a nod accompanying it.

“Alright, go get them off on whatever adventure they need to do.” She gestured for all of them to get to the garage where they kept Strickler's car.

Jim sat up in the front seat with his stepdad, occasionally looking over at all his trollish glory. “Must be nice not to worry about sunlight.” He spoke softly.

“I think I used to be a stalkling before, and you have experience with how they can go in the sun, Young Atlas.” Strickler spoke, looking out at the road. “So it makes sense that I can go in the sunlight.”

“Kind of wish I'd taken Vendel up on a few of the gems before. I'm sure they're in Trollmarket somewhere. I should ask Blinky.”

“Oh?” Jim could hear the quirked eyebrow in his gravely voice.

“Yeah, one of the stones he had from past Trollhunters that apparently allowed travel into sunlight.”

“Huh.” Claire piped up from the back, straightening up in her seat. “If we find that -”

“I don't need to worry about the sun.” Jim finished, turning to look at the three in the backseat of Strickler's car.

“That _would_ be sweet.” Toby cupped his chin in thought. “Isn't that like, the biggest issue you have with being a troll?”

“Oh, wait, I don't have the amulet anymore.” Jim complained, smacking the palm of his hand against his forehead. “And I need it to use the stones.”

“There is jewellery you can wear to use stones. Merlin's amulet isn't the only way, Jim.” Walter pointed out. “Vendel must have briefed you on the wider elemental spectrum magical beings use, yes?”

“Yeah, he said stuff about gemstones being cut for magic over aesthetics.”

“So you're saying, Jim could have some kind of ring or necklace using the stone?” Claire piped up from the back of the car. “He could be in daylight?” Hope snaked its way into her tone.

“That's if it even works for me. Vendel stressed it was a temperamental stone anyway.” Jim shrugged. “I'll just be happy to be...”

“ _You_ again?” Claire took her turn to cut in and finish a sentence. “I know, Jim. I'm glad that we can even try and recreate it. With Nari, we'll have a better shot too!”

“Just... Don't go trying to undo it.” He half-joked, still thinking about what might have caused him to revert to his human body.

“Jim, I don't think I could go through with it again. I wanted you back – that's all.” Her voice went quiet, Strickler making a small noise in response.

“Anyway, yes, you could theoretically use it in some jewellery, provided it's cut correctly.” He continued his previous statement, trying to bring some hope back to a bleak conversation.

The remainder of the drive was silent, not even the ring of music through the speakers to break the quiet that had fallen upon them, suffocating conversation from occurring. It took Strickler's final comment as they pulled up to the deserted travel agency to break it.

“We're here.” His gruff voice sounded, Jim unsure if he was more tired or pained about his return to old stomping grounds.

As they approached, the group could get a good look at the travel agency that was the base's cover. How quickly things could tarnish in time – paint weathered and already significantly faded.

“Really hoping that a gruesome hasn't gotten in here.” Jim spoke flatly, picking his way up to the building through weeds and broken pavement. “Right, Darci, you haven't been here before. This is what is left of the Janus Order.” He gestured to the building.

A large shadow fell across him, and a look up proved it to simply be Strickler. A teacher's tone lilted his words as he spoke, correcting Jim, “The Janus Order is _scattered_ across the _world_. The forces are in disarray, and after the Eternal Night, the Arcadian base was deserted.” He ran his clawed hand over the front desk.

“Admittedly, I was once the head of this branch, and this building serves as a graveyard for the massacre of changelings by Gunmar's hands. I haven't had the chance to remove the remains. I can promise no gruesome has gotten in. This is the easiest entrance to get to – the others require changeling locks.”

“Gruesomes?” Darci echoed, soaking in a majority of the entrance, but the name of the creature was something she had not heard of before.

“Troll vulture.” Toby leaned in to explain as quickly as possible. “Goes after the corpses of dead trolls. Would a changeling count, Mr. Strickler?” He glanced up at the stalking changeling.

“If they died in their troll form, then yes. Also, feel free to call me Walter, Tobias.”

“Eh, that's weird. It's either Mr. S or Strickler, bro. I think the only one who should really be on a first name basis with you is Jim.” Toby stuck his hands in his pockets as Walter moved around the desk to punch a code in on the telephone without having to pick up the earpiece. “Besides, are you going to return to school in the fall?”  
“Depends on the kids, I might just be a stay at home dad.” Jim made a face at that. Waltolomew ignored him before something clicked. “There we go.”

The floor lurched beneath them, Darcy being the only one really caught off guard by it as it lowered them down to the basement.

The rusting doors creaked open to reveal empty blue-white halls, bones and skulls littered in the corner. Jim paused, watching as Walter strode down old stamping grounds, pausing to look at a particular pile of bones before squatting with a knife to poke at it. “Do you remember where you got the last limb from?” He nonchalantly asked.

“Huh?” Jim blinked.

“It may affect the outcome of what you look like. Likely it may influence your body after the transformation. A bone from a changeling that might have been a stalkling might result in potential wings, or a mountain troll's bulky form.” He explained, straightening back up to move down the halls, listening for voices no longer there.

“We were the ones that grabbed it.” Toby spoke up, running past Jim to catch up to the old soul. “Er, I think it was down this hall, and around that corner.” He pointed.

Strickler nodded, allowing Toby to lead the way. Claire popped out of a portal beside him, leaving Darcy and Jim to bring up the rear.

“Man, it's freaky down here.” Darci started, before catching herself. “Mostly of just how... Weird it is.”

“Yeah, I didn't see it here until we were gathering the ingredients for Merlin's potion the first time around, and Senor Uhl had placed Krel and Aja in my care so I wouldn't have to repeat sophomore year.” Jim spoke up.

“Looks like you might be re-enrolling.” Darci teased. “Guess you didn't get out of high school early.”

“Well, with luck, I can still ditch it. I don't need high school as a troll. Good bye calculus!”

Darci snorted at Jim's distaste in math. “It makes so much more sense now, with all the school you missed anyway.”

“Yeah, saving the world came at the great cost of the best years of my human life.” Sarcasm dripped off of Jim's words before he heard Toby's shouts echoing down the hall.

“Found it!” He called, escorted by an appropriately bone-chilling crack before the other three turned back, a long bone held in Claire's hand.

“Just as we left the skeleton.” She gestured with the bone.

“Can you... maybe not wave it around?” Darci inquired, eyes fixed on the bone.  
“Sorry, right.” Claire stilled her movements, choosing to cradle the femur instead.

“And with that, time to abscond.” Strickler interjected, herding them back the way they came. Jim was all too happy to leave, binding the halls back in their buried secrecy beneath Arcadia's soil.

With the bone, it left one more thing, and he still needed to call on another favour.

“So, you need my assistance again?” The Akaridion questioned, blue head tilted as he did _something_ on his laptop – Jim wasn't really in the mood to question him.

“Yeah, I need lightning in a bottle again.” He draped his left arm over the bicep of his right, taking a sip of the tea in his cup, making a face at how bitter and overly sweet the beverage was.

The Tarrons' living room was painfully old fashioned – bright orange and a little hard on the eyes. A dolled up woman pattered around nearby, an odd smile plastered on her face as she jabbered on to a well dressed man, both of them sounding like someone's audio remix project.

“Ah.” Krel nodded, rubbing at his nose with one of his left arms. “It's not too difficult to hack into the electrical systems, and they haven't bothered updating the security since Aja cracked into it. Earthen technology is so _basic_.”

He huffed and took a sip of his own cup with his lower right arm – it wasn't the tea Jim had been offered. It was something from his home world.

“Well, now we should have plenty of metal around here, plenty to trap the spark.” He shrugged.

“Perfect.” Jim nodded as well. “I'll leave you to it.”

“I guess you don't have that safety suit anymore, do you?” Krel teased him, a hairless brow quirking up.

“No. I wish.” Jim wistfully sighed, thinking back on the loss of the amulet. “I miss it.”

Krel made a noise in understanding. “I know how it feels. I mean, a little anyway. I went from my home on Akaridion-5, and being like this, to being gross and _fleshy_. There's really nothing like being myself.”

Jim nodded, getting it after his return to skin and bone, knowing the miss of being something _more._

“ _Well_ , give me twenty mekrons, and I'll have the jar prepped and the electricity re-routed.” Krel paused when he finished, looking at his lower arms. “Actually, maybe fifteen mekrons. I have the hands.”   
  


Krel had been way too excited to cause chaos in the power system of Arcadia, and with a short blackout period, Jim had the final piece of the puzzle – lightning in a bottle that he stashed in his room alongside the bone wrapped in a garbage bag.

Douxie arrived in Arcadia, Nari hiding at his side with large glasses and a beanie hiding her hair but antlers sticking out like some interesting choice of human accessories. Her clothes were human, camoflage to conceal herself amongst humans while they hid from the rest of the Arcane Order.

“Hey, Douxie.” Jim smiled, waving to them as he sat outside the cafe Doux used to work at.

“Good to see you, Jim.” His eyebrows shot up, accompanying the easy smile he always had. Archie perched on his shoulder before jumping down to stretch out. “How's life?”

“Life.” Jim shrugged before getting to his feet. “I have what you need at Toby's house. I've been living there for the past week.”

Douxie nodded. “Well, let's get going. You're probably anxious to get started.” He shifted the bag on his shoulder, fixing the bill of his hat. “Lead the way.”

Jim nodded, stuffing his hands in his jean pockets as they wandered off.

“Hey, how hard would it be to make a new amulet?”

“Eh... Hard enough. Claire's pretty close to being a Master Wizard herself, but the thing is, we don't have the elements needed to make it. Merlin had used Morgana's hand to make the metal for it, and we needed a specific framework for it.”

“Hm. Yeah, the Order destroyed the amulet to resurrect her. I can _kind of_ remember it from when I was the beast.” Jim scratched at his forearm as they walked.

Nari was silent at their sides up until then. “What we are about to do – I am sorry for the amulet's destruction, but think about this as an apology, Jim.”

“I don't blame you Nari.” Jim smiled softly at the nature spirit. “I blame the other two – mostly for the corruption of Arthur and Morgana.”

Nari nodded, fiddling with a hoodie string.

Douxie and Jim fell into quiet conversation after that, catching up about everything that had occurred since Nari and Douxie's departure.

Jim turned the corner, heart starting to pound in his chest, jack-hammering away at a human's rib cage. Soon he'd be free, no longer weak. Back into his proper puzzle pieced place, back into a hearth's fire for two worlds, blazing protection in Hestia's breast.

“Excited?” Douxie teased, gently prodding Jim in the side with his elbow, a blush blooming on Jim's cheeks.

“Yeah – yeah, I guess so.” He breathlessly laughed as he walked up to the door, waiting for Douxie and Nari to join him before he pushed into the house. “I'll have to introduce you to my mom and stepdad after. Strickler is going to go nuts.”

“Wait, Strickler, as in _Waltolomew Stricklander_?” Douxie paused on the doorstep, eyebrows skyrocketing to the moon. “Like, Janus Order leader Strickler?”  
“Yeah, that's the one. He changed sides against Gunmar and he and mom have been going pretty strong.” Jim shrugged. “I saw him as a father figure before I became the Trollhunter. Funny how he ended up being my stepdad.”

“Huh.” Hisirdoux's shoulders arched up.

“As if you haven't seen weirder things.” Nari teased, pushing past both of them. “It stinks in here.” She noted, hand going to pinch her nose.

“Guess I got used to it. Nana has a bunch of cats,” Jim explained. “Toby! I'm back!” Jim called, going off to the living room.

Toby sat on the couch, eyes fixed on an episode of Gun Robot, hand in a bag of Nougat Nummies. “Oh, hey, Jimbo.” He tore his eyes away from the cartoon to look at the three. “Good to see you, Douxie!” He waved and got up, bringing over a handful of sweets with him.

“Toby, this is Nari. I don't know if Merlin introduced you or not.” Douxie's voice wavered for a brief moment on the name of his adoptive father.

“Eh, I can't really remember if I got her name, but we can start over.” Toby shrugged before smiling earnestly and holding out the handful to her. “Hey, Nari, pleased to meet you. I'm Toby.”

“Pleasure to meet you, Toby.” She bowed her head slightly, smiling back as she took the gift to put into her pockets. “I'll eat these later, thank you.”

Toby nodded before scratching at his neck. “Should I call Claire? How soon are you going through things?”

“Well... First I need to make the potion.” Douxie smiled.

“I'm going to get the lightning in the jar and the bone.” He left the group, head spinning in anticipation as he went to his room, scooping up the femur in its protective plastic in one hand and the jar cradled in the crook of his other elbow. Jim gave the room a final glance, hoping the next time he saw the room he was back to himself.

“Alright, here you go.” Jim returned.

Douxie and Nari had left the room, and Jim followed the sound of things being taken out of Douxie's bag. He entered the kitchen to watch as the Master Wizard laid out jars and bottles, and the antramonstrum shell. Jim unwrapped the bone and set it and the jar among the rest.

“Good, everything is of high quality, and here.” Nari nodded sagely, producing a few tools needed to work.

Jim sat and watched. Last time he only saw Merlin finishing up the elixir. “Man, I honestly wished I didn't eat the blender.” He cracked a joke. “Also, yeah, Toby – get Claire over here.”

Toby nodded, quickly calling Claire. It wasn't long before she popped into the kitchen through a portal, staring at everything.

“So, it's spell time?” Claire asked, hands resting on her hips.

“Hello again, Fair Claire.” Douxie smiled warmly at her. “Do you want to help?”

“Yes, please. I would like to have a hand in making what will... uh... re-troll my boyfriend.”

Nari's lips quirked in a short smile as she gestured Claire over. “Alright, so we'll need to crush up the gem parts of the antramonstrum shell...”

Jim stared at them, watching as Toby and Claire both helped out. Douxie offered Jim a turn at working at some of the elixir. He nodded. Nari walked him through a couple of steps. She hesitated as they got to the femur, and Jim watched as his partners flinched at the sound of bone cracking, but he hadn't. What that said about him, he was unsure.

It took until the late afternoon for them to finish what it took Merlin an hour or so. Jim watched as Nari took the bowl full of the mixture to cast a spell upon it, enchanting it. He watched as it went bright green.

“There we go. It's good.” Nari announced.

Jim's shoulders relaxed as she poured it into the bottle with the crackle of power.

“Is it supposed to look like that?” Claire asked, worry pinching her brow.

“Yeah, it goes black in a couple of minutes.” Jim set his elbow on the table, watching as neon faded to the same inky black, foot tapping on the floor. “Now... I could just use it myself, but there's the offer to be not the only troll in the room.”

“It might be best if you are though.” Douxie pointed out. Toby's brow pinched.

“Tobes?” Jim looked at him.   
“I'm always left behind.” He mumbled. “I mean, he's probably right, and it's probably best if you go alone.”

Toby's sigh caught in his chest and he shook his head. “You need it more, Jim.”  
“You can always take up magic.” Nari touched his shoulder. Toby shrugged.

“Alright, I can give it a shot.”

“Hey, I think you'd be good at it.” Claire smiled. “Besides, I need a not-shadow wizard to compliment my shadow magic.”

Toby smiled at that, taking Claire's hand to cling to her. Their focus moved to Jim as he got to his feet, going to hold both of them close.

“One last human hug for you two.” He grinned. Toby and Claire returned the fierceness.

“See you on the flip-side, Jimbo.” Toby kissed his cheek.

“Go take your bath.” Claire let go, teasing before waving him off.

Jim nodded. “Don't have to tell me twice.” He scooped the ink filled jar up before glancing over to Nari.

“I'm coming.” She smiled, following him up to the bathroom.  
  


  
Nari sat on the toilet while she watched Jim fill the tub, the jar sitting innocently on the counter.  
“Man, last time I was doing this, Merlin made it sound like it was my only option. To protect everyone, it kind of was. It's not like I had many other choices.” He drummed his fingers on the edge of the tub.

“He had his reasons.” Nari voiced, taking her hat off and ran a hand through her bushy hair, leaves fluttering to the tiled floor as she shook them free like loose hairs.

“Now I have mine.” Jim simply said, watching as the tub filled up. “This time I don't have a suit of armour to protect me. I know what to expect.” He ran a hand through the water. It was pleasantly warm. “World's worst bath bomb though.”

“Why would you put explosives in a bath?” Nari asked, making him snort.

“It's not an explosive. A bath bomb is a bunch of stuff that fizzes when you put it in water. You know what? We'll get you one after I'm back.”

Nari nodded. Jim got back to his feet, turning the taps off once there was a sufficient amount in the tub.

“Alright, I cannot interfere with what happens after, but I can promise that you will come out a changed man.”

“That's the plan.” Jim hummed, pouring the contents of the jar out into the bath. He pulled the shirt over his head, leaving the black compression tank on. He kicked his shoes off and shoved his pants off, leaving himself in his boxers. He ran his hands along the edge of his binder before discarding that as well.

The ink pooled across the surface of the water, an endless void promising to end his humanity and bring him _more_.

“I'll tell you about this when I get back.” Jim smiled as he sensed her curious gaze, climbing into the tub.

“You are what you are, Jim.” Nari shrugged. “You're you.”

The crinkle of a nougat nummie's wrapper sounded in the echo of the room. Jim nodded as he sat down, hands going to the edge of the tub to brace himself as he settled. He took a few final breaths before going under.

He greeted the pain that followed the rush of water like an old friend, screaming out where no one could hear him.

The pain faded eventually, settling into skin that couldn't quite feel the grass under his back. Jim knew before his eyes snapped open that he was a troll again, running his hands over the grass before getting to his feet and taking stock.

There was no surprise that he was only in underwear. The surprise was that he made it out in his boxers. His hips were narrower now, the fabric fitting a little looser on his hips.

He ran his hands over his flat chest, sighing happily. His hands were still uneven, four fingered on his left, three fingered on his right. All stone, though. Jim's mouth felt strange again, having just gotten used to not having fangs again and he smacked them as he started walking. He'd been dumped in the woods behind his mother's house this time.

At least it wasn't where he'd been abandoned in the middle of the forest before, left to the mercy of Angor Rot, hunting him down as his skin stretched over mutating bone, becoming more troll than hunter.

Night time had fallen since he had dipped under. He had not expected it to take a short period of time to change.

It was nice to have the weight to his head again, though it ached with a hollow thudding as he adjusted to the horns again.

And with night time came the nightlife in the neighbourhood. He could hear Blinky's voice carrying through the open window as he snuck by the house. AAARRRGGHH!! was likely to already be over at the Domzalskis'.

He tripped over long legs with all the grace of a newborn deer and grinned, laughing to himself as he hopped up to the door, the last stretch easily passed with a jump, knees bending to soak up the shock.

AAARRRGGHH!!'s voice was the first to greet him upon entry. “Troll Jim!” He cried out happily from the living room, catching his scent.

Jim wasted no time going to run in, tackling their friend. AAARRRGGHH!!'s rocky laugh felt funny against him and he let go of the mossy fur on AAARRRGGHH!!'s back to allow the Krubera to pull him into a rib crushing hug, cackling as he held onto AAARRRGGHH!!, burying his face against the stone.

The Krubera grinned, dumping him back onto his own two feet, helping Jim regain his balance.

“Thanks, bud.” Jim smiled up at him before looking around. Claire and Toby's eyes were fixed on him and they lept to hug him.

“How are you feeling?” Claire asked him, hand going up to run her fingers through messy hair.

“Like I'm home. It feels so _good_. Thank you.” He tilted his head back to meet her touch. “Got used to being human again, so everything's weird again, but at least I know what to expect.”

Claire hummed, hand tapping on his chest. “You hold yourself differently – you're proud of who you are again.” Her voice was soft. “This is a much better Jim.”

“My Nougat Nummy simile still stands.” Toby piped up before he pulled back to look over Jim. “We... should try to find something for you to wear. Pants might be out of the question until we can get into a store.”

“As long as it can fit on me, I'll be okay. Strickler's probably got some tips for fitting into clothes as a troll.”

“Or troll clothes.” AAARRRGGHH!! suggested. Toby nodded.

“I think the biggest part of my breakdown last time was the fact I couldn't just... Be this.” Jim gestured to himself. “Shit really sucks when I can't just wear something else.”

Claire gave him a sympathetic turn of the lips before kissing his cheek.

“What's all this, then?” Douxie started, cutting into the room. “Oh, Jim – you look good.”

“Thank you.” Jim grinned, going to sit down for a moment. “It's good to be home.”  
  


After digging around in old clothes kept on hand, Jim found a shirt and shorts that weren't horrible on his body. He honestly appreciated Toby's larger clothes to fit his wider frame, and the knit fabric of the t-shirt didn't snag on his horns – a welcome reassurance.

“Alright.” Jim scratched his cheek before pulling on one of his signature blue hoodies to test if it still fit. It couldn't really zip up, but if it was left undone, it fit well enough. He couldn't _fight_ in it, but it was a significant improvement on wearing nothing but armour for months on end. “Time to go see mom.”

AAARRRGGHH!! lead the way across the road, Jim close behind. Douxie and Nari followed with Claire and Toby bringing up the rear, on guard to protect the demigod.

Jim paced forward past AAARRRGGHH!! to the door, opening it up. “Hey, mom!” He called, hearing Dictatious and Blinky in the other room, laughing over something with Strickler.

“Hey, kiddo!” Barbara called. “In the living room!”

Jim relaxed, stepping into the house to let everyone after him enter before turning into the living room. “I'm home.” He gestured to himself, grinning wider at the chorus of gasps.

“By Deya's Grace!” Blinky's gasp was the loudest, getting to his feet before crossing the room to Jim's side. Barbara joined his surrogate troll father, their hands going to cup Jim's face. “How did this come about?”

“I had some magic help.” He smiled, tilting into their touch before hugging both of them. “It feels so good to be a troll again.”

He heard Douxie introducing Nari to the others in the room, and Strickler's voice piping up in awe, but Jim was too preoccupied with some of the people he loved the most.

“It feels so _good_ to be back.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a quick break to smack something out between the first part and part two. 
> 
> Claire, using something she should have used before to glean a glimpse of Jim while he takes his second troll bath.

It took Claire all of twenty minutes during Jim's absence to dip into the shadow realm to search for her boyfriend's soul. Just out of curiosity, not to abort what precious thing he chose to do out of his own making this time, instead of being forced into a crappy card hand by a wizard at the end of his years.

Her physical body – well, that remained on the couch in Nancy Domzalski's house as Jim committed to a life of change. Douxie was keeping an eye on her, and so was Toby. She felt relatively sound in leaving them the important task of watching over her while she dived into Morgana's realm.

Time slowed in the voided place, with little light shining through. She wondered if Jim would be the same down here – his soul reflected as the human, or if there had been a change to his half-human self.

Guilt bit at the lining of her belly. She should have dived here before, should have had Not-Enrique keep an eye on her in her room to keep an eye on Jim ever since they returned because he didn't seem quite right. She should have, anyway. Maybe it would have spared Jim some grief and worry.

“Like it would have done anything to help.” She dryly spoke to herself, going deeper. “Maybe that happened for a reason. Either way, it's getting fixed Claire.”

There were three paths his soul could take down there. The first would be a reflection of his human self – though Claire also doubted that the human soul was really Jim; or if it was just the remnants of a Trollhunter sewn into service, skin stitched into the wretched metals of Merlin's creation, Troll-ness torn from him to create a full monster. The second path would be the troll-human self that was complete, in hindsight.  
And the third was that he would appear as neither, for his body was likely transforming with soul to _fix_ himself.

Really, Claire had _no_ clue on what form he'd appear in.

It could have been minutes or hours when she finally touched upon the remnant of Killahead bridge, though it was empty of any inhabitants. Jim no longer patrolled its curve, chanting his mantra of 'the Trollhunter must answer every call', echoing the worries of changeling familiars. Her heart sank at the recollections, tears welling up at ghostly eyes.

She brushed them away on a crooked finger, glancing around to see if she _could_ find him. There – a short distance away was a particular couch she recognized as the couch from the Lake household living room, where Jim had been with so many epiphanies. It made sense he'd be there.

Pushing off the rock, Claire sailed towards the couch, grabbing onto the arm to pull herself over. She took a deep breath before letting herself see what she was staring at.

The couch, accompanied by the coffee table that typically sat in front with a tidy footprint in the shape of a muddy sabaton, was currently occupied by a sleeping figure. Claire smiled, pulling herself to look at the face of Jim as he slept peacefully for the first time in probably months.

He was caught between two worlds – teeth poking out from his bottom lip and the blue pallor of his face returning with its warm rocky texture. Ears, pointed and sticking out from black hair that started to become shaggy again. It all looked painful, watching the slight and slow changes, but his soul looked at peace, for once.

Claire patted the back of the couch, leaning over to brush her lips against Jim's forehead.

“I'll see you soon, back at the house, my dear Romeo.” She murmured, hand running through his bangs before pulling away and returning home to her body.Her own shoulders felt lighter too – knowing that he was okay. He would be okay and would continue to do _just_ fine. After all, Jim Lake Jr was a stubborn soul, and Claire loved him for every part of himself, and would continue for as long as he needed her, and wanted her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> claire's really not a fan of merlin but doesnt really speak it out loud.
> 
> Also, part one has finally been edited to a place I'm happy with (for now). now, onto writing part three.

**Author's Note:**

> I did read a few other fics with this sort of topic of jim looking to be a troll again / jim's feelings post wizaards. i mean, once rise of the titans comes out, this fic will probably be obsolete but i still had fun writing it!! 
> 
> if you want to yell at me more about wizards, i'm on twitter @starconsequence!
> 
> I might do another follow up / come back to this to do edits. I just wanted this up :') thank you for reading my 15k lovechild.


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